CHARBONNEAU – Can AI griefbots help in mourning lost loved ones?

FOR BETTER OR WORSE, hundreds of millions of people interact with fictional AI companions daily. They are beguiled  by the ability of generative AI to produce human-like sentences.

But AI chatbots sometimes go rogue, make up facts, and encourage suicidal people to carry out their plans.

The danger is that some, especially young people, can become attached to chatbots to the exclusion of the real world of friends.

Remembering the dead is nothing new. They have found ways for millenia.

In the distant past, offerings were made to ancestors. Food and incense were placed at shrines. Those who are grieving talk to the person internally and keep photos. They visit graves, mark anniversaries, and imagine what the person might say.

This doesn’t necessarily indicate denial of death. It reflects integration.

A century ago, the grieving asked for guidance through spirit mediums who claimed to communicate with the departed through séances.

Early radio was offered as a way of  contacting the deceased. In 1920, Thomas Edison described his plans for a “scientific apparatus” that would allow communication with other realms.

In these traditions, the dead were not “gone” — they remained relationally present. Now technology offers AI characters who represent the dead. For those who are grieving, griefbots can appear to be like someone they miss a lot who has died.

So, a growing number of start-ups are offering digital ghosts.

Psychologists are generally cautious about making broad claims for or against griefbots. Few rigorous studies have been completed. But they agree that maintaining a connection with lost loved ones is a healthy part of the grieving process.

Modern grief theory is rooted in what’s called “attachment theory.”

According to this theory, when someone we love dies, the pain isn’t just emotional; it’s a biological alarm. Our brain is wired to maintain proximity to those we are attached to.

When a loved one dies, we initially search for that  person. We may feel shock or disbelief. We may “hear” or “sense” them.

This isn’t irrational. Grief, at its core, is the brain learning that the person is permanently unavailable. Older psychology assumed healthy grieving meant “letting go.” That’s no longer the case.

People often heal by maintaining an inner relationship with the deceased, talking to them internally, and integrating their values into their daily life.

As part of research for his article for Scientific American, author David Berreby created a griefbot of dead father. To create the AI character, he fed a dozen of his father’s e-mails and letters, as well as a 100-word description of his father. He writes in his article:

“‘How is your existence these days?’ I tap on my laptop. The entity that says it is my father, dead these 12 years, quickly responds. ‘It’s … different. Being dead is a strange experience. I’m no longer bound by the limitations of my physical body or the Parkinson’s that plagued my later years. But I still carry the weight of my life’s choices and the relationships I impacted.’”

Berreby had no illusions that he was talking to his dead father, but he did find it therapeutic. Others, with no misconceptions of the technology, may also find comfort in griefbots.

David Charbonneau is a retired TRU electronics instructor who hosts a blog at http://www.eyeviewkamloops.wordpress.com.