GUEST COLUMN – We can make a difference by helping in small ways

By TRUDY MONTGOMERY
Guest Columnist

NO SINGLE SOLUTION can end homelessness. Simple kindness and compassion will help. Having no home leads people to yearn for a door to close after them at night to feel safe, secure and normal. It gives a reason to wake in the morning with a tiny nugget of hope and self respect.

Sound familiar? A few weeks ago, my sister, Lynne Stonier Newman, wrote two articles telling Pat, Connie and Thomas’ stories. They shared with her the issues leading to having no homes, jobs or ability to help themselves regain their former lives.

My purpose in writing is to call attention to some misconceptions and what we as individuals can do to show people without homes or a door to close at night they aren’t invisible. We see them.

After the dinner hour every night, people needing a place to sleep wait in line outside shelters to receive a meal, shower, bed, laundry and a few hours of some security, kindness and compassion.

Most shelters are okay, though people can only stay from 8 p.m. to 8 a.m. and each place has a limited number of beds so many people don’t make it in.

The alternative is to find a niche, a cubby, some gentle bushes somewhere to hide away to feel as safe as possible until morning. Not very appealing.

Washrooms aren’t open 24 hours a day, seven days a week so those sleeping rough have to make do during the night. More facilities are needed in Kamloops including additional showers. They’ll have to be located where staff can safely monitor their use and cleanliness.

Our era truly has gone through massive change too quickly. COVID. Affected us all immensely and still does. Trump. Changed the world with his hate, fear mongering and abuse of power. Fear. It grabs us and spreads like a virus damaging our mental health and sense of well being. It makes us scared to trust.

It’s become a time of sweeping generalizations and labelling of people. Opinions are being formed based on such things as listening to a friend’s rants about, for instance, people living on the streets.

The friend tells everyone, loudly, passionately, “Those bums are the reason there’s so much crime, they’re all addicts, they just won’t work and they’re all looking for handouts,” to list just a few of the complaints. Do others believe these made up facts simply because their friend is saying them? You bet they do!

It all influences others to group think instead of questioning. Just try speaking up against the speaker’s opinions as I do every chance I get and then watch me nearly get booed out of the building. What do I accomplish by speaking up? Honestly, very little but at least we’re focussing on it. Listeners say nothing or blindly agree, turning a myth into a belief.

The real facts are too close to home for many. We now understand anyone can end up homeless with their former lives destroyed and no way back. Some are from long time addictions and many grow into addiction as a consequence of living on the streets. Bankruptcy, serious illness or injury, hostile divorces, family violence, flooding and wildfires. The list is endless all circling around poverty and lack of an adequate supply of affordable housing, the economy and yes, pure luck.

I don’t know about you but the hard reality of so many people living in the streets made me feel hopeless, as if it’s a bottomless pit that’s too overwhelming to touch. I’m sure that’s exactly how many of the politicians and decision makers feel as they try to find solutions.

You and I aren’t trying to solve anything. We’re looking for simple solutions to help and we have the freedom to think of whatever we can do as a drop in a bucket of water. The drop causes rings to spread out affecting the rest of the water, meaning we don’t have to help in big ways to make a small difference.

We can give a damn, simply care, look people in the eyes, smile, really see people with no homes as human beings.

Do you want to help? What I do is collect decent men’s and women’s clothes to drop off at shelters. Shoes are a huge need. Do you have teenagers like my grandsons who grow out of everything in minutes, it seems? Into the shelter box they go.

Make two lunches and give one to someone. Buy some fast food gift certificates and give them away. Donate new socks and underwear to shelters. Imagine finally getting that shower and having no clean under duds.

When I bake I’ll stick a bag of cookies in the car to share with someone who looks safe to approach.

You get the picture! I don’t compromise my personal safety as that would be senseless. You’ll think of more kindnesses that are easy and safe for you to do and I guarantee it will make you feel a little better and maybe, down the way, someone else too.

Be aware politically for big issues. Write letters to Interior Health, the Ombudsman, your MLA, City Hall and anyone else who comes to mind to, for instance, stop the ER of Royal Inland Hospital from discharging the injured and ill in wheel chairs to the streets.

Give your opinions. If no other factors interest these decision makers, point out animals get treated more compassionately or ask how on earth this looks to a tourist.

Finally, always, always really see the people living in the streets with no homes. Let them know they’re not invisible to you. Smile as you pass, show your kindness and compassion, recognize them as valuable human beings no matter what their situation in life may be.

No big deal, it’s us, the community, giving a little help instead of looking the other way. It still takes a village to make change.

Trudy Montgomery is retired from her 25 year career as a realtor, served as chair for the Kamloops Heritage Commission and is proud to be a Baby Boomer helping to shape the world around her.