A new way to talk to myself.

I feel so with it today. I am a tweeter. Or a twitterer. Whatever you call it.

All I need now is my first follower. Any follower. Anyone?

The instructions told me it would take five minutes to set up my Twitter account. Several hours later, I finally summoned help and reporter Michele Young — who describes herself as a “lurker,” which is someone who reads other people’s tweets as opposed to tweeting herself — got things set up for me.

It was the same with the blog. Catherine Litt, one of our associate editors, got me going on that, but I still don’t know how to post pictures. I bought the Dummies book, of course, but the problem with those is that they’re out of date by the time they hit the shelves. The instructions for posting pictures don’t match what’s actually going on in the computer because of the obsession technical people have with making things work “better.” So they change procedures and categories and pretty soon there’s no resemblance to the way it used to work.

It’s all an exercise in humiliation, anyway. So far, I’m tweeting only to myself. In essence, this is just a modern-day way of talking to myself. But that’s OK — I see that Terry Lake and Cathy McLeod have precious few followers, either.

But, hey, I’m there for you, Terry and Cathy, waiting to receive your words of pearls of wisdom in 140 words or less.