EVANS — The second time around is no cakewalk

Kara Evans writes on parenting for the Armchair Mayor News.

COLUMN — Not too long ago my husband very lovingly said to me, “Women really must have the worst memories ever.” Normally I’d argue with him and try and defend myself, but he’s kind of right.

Allow me to elaborate on why I so easily raised the white flag of defeat: Any day now, Baby Evans Numero Dos will be making her appearance and while I couldn’t be more excited to meet our new addition, I’m also finding that second pregnancies are overrated.

Now, before everyone starts slinging comments shouting, “Why have kids to begin with if you think that?” allow me to lower the flag a little and explain myself.

It seems as though that in subsequent pregnancies, your body has a bizarre memory and adjusts sooner, as if saying to itself, “Well, we know what’s coming, let’s just get it all out of the way now!” Your baby bump grows faster, the swelling starts sooner, and you become a miserable human being much, much quicker. You know what’s coming and you grow impatient for it to just happen so you can get it over with. During your first pregnancy, ignorance truly is bliss and nearly every milestone is an exciting one.

Of course, I can’t forget about the End Game, the point during pregnancy when you’re beyond being done with pregnancy and are trying every old wives’ tale in the book to help bring on labour just a teensy bit early. You’ll find yourself wishing many unpleasant things upon the people who tell you, “Baby will come when baby is ready!” when all you really want to do is just eat that whole pineapple and go for a bumpy ride down a dirt road with hopes that it will bring on a baby.

This is where my husband’s comments of having a horrible memory are really verified. Why on earth do we women want to go through all of this numerous times? Are we that oblivious to what’s happening? While the whining goes on for maybe three or four or the whole months, we quickly seem to forget about how much being pregnant can suck the life right out of you. Almost every day there is an, “Oh, right, I forgot about THIS part” moment where I hate being pregnant and question why I chose to do it all over again.

Of course, the bad things do come to an end and I’m reminded why I wanted to be pregnant again. After all of the hip and back pain, morning sickness, and heartburn I’m blessed with a tiny human to take care of and raise. Life balances itself out and soon enough, we find ourselves wanting to hop on the pregnancy train once again. Strange creatures, we women are, and it’s as if the memory of all those ailments vanish along with the pregnancy hormones.

While pregnancy absolutely is a beautifully miraculous thing to experience, it’s no cakewalk and I never expected it to be. Just let me whine it out for nine months and keep reminding me of the light at the end of the tunnel makes everything worth it.

Kara Evans tweets from @KaraEvs and blogs on http://www.shewriteswords.com.